Journal Entries

I will be penning down my thoughts here.

If you would like to know more about my day then connect with me on my socials.

Hunting for internships has been taking up the majority of my free time. Studies are going alright, not too bad, not too good. I have been working out consistently. I’ve been waking up with lots of energy these days, which I think is really cool. I read Elon’s tweet about how he thinks civilization reaching Kardashev Scale I can be achieved by 2035. That has me hyped. People like that, I look up to them. I myself am trying to learn each day, trying to gather enough knowledge to use it wisely. Or is it a trap? An infinite loop where I do nothing else, just learn. If so, then I need to ensure I get out of that loop and start moving more atoms.

I sit by the window as I am writing, the wind is blowing and the weather is dark & gloomy. The fall is here, winter’s about to come soon. The plants, trees, and the rest of the vegetation are changing color. I am going to try to sit and write down what GREATNESS means to me.

My dream? My ambitions? My goals? All of these things point to one thing, and that’s my desire for GREATNESS. Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, Augustus Caesar, and Napoleon—all of these great people inspire me. They inspire me to chase greatness, and when I am inspired by these greats of our past, I feel humbled, humbled in a way that’s powerful. I find myself thinking how lucky we were to have had these people contribute to our history. I look up to people like this, people who are courageous and brave enough to chase their dreams. I can only wish to be like them, in body or spirit.

There would be times where I would be insanely drawn even to fictional characters such as Griffith, Johan, and Chrollo Lucilfer. I like to believe that it is their discipline, and their ability to be detached from materialistic things, that draws me in. I would like to be like them in my chase toward greatness. But what is ‘GREATNESS’? What am I chasing? I think I am chasing the GREATS and not GREATNESS, and I do not think that there is anything wrong with it.

All of the greats of the past chased someone else.

Alexander the Great chased Achilles.

Julius Caesar chased Alexander the Great.

Augustus chased permanence, the kind of order that outlives chaos.

Napoleon chased both Alexander and Caesar, determined to outshine them in conquest and destiny alike.

So greatness to me means becoming an immortal force, mastering myself completely, shaping the world through will and vision, and joining the eternal chain of those who changed history forever.

And here I am, centuries later, realizing that my own chase will look vastly different. The modern world offers no empires to conquer, no legions to command, no marble to immortalize my name upon. Perhaps that is why I find it hard to begin, because the battlefield of greatness has changed.

Yet somewhere deep within, I know that the essence remains the same.
The chase continues, only its form has evolved.

The past week was pretty relaxing. My girlfriend came to visit and stayed for a week. She cooked, and we spent time together, which I really enjoyed. I also had two midterms last week, both of which I think I did average on. My sleep schedule was pretty bad as well.

This week, I have already finished my assignments. I plan to make good progress on GPT-2 and the other anonymous project we are working on. I also need to find time to study for my Artificial Intelligence class. I plan to keep myself busy throughout the week. Let's see how it goes.

This week has been incredibly productive. I hosted the web, studied, and am currently trying to build GPT-2 from scratch. I believe I have made good progress. I plan to link the project on the web sometime next week. This week is going to be incredibly busy, with exams, another anonymous project, and the one I am already working on.

My running frequency has gone down a little, which I plan to improve this week. I also hope to stay on campus most of the time to remain productive. Besides that, I think everything is going pretty well, and I hope to get even better.

I was thinking that my site, to update, would constantly need to be updated via git commit. So I should either add a functionality that allows me to add entries, update projects, & add photos, or do it the hard way - using git commit. Then there's this other way, using a service called n8n, which automates everything. Probably a good idea but I can't say for sure yet.

So after careful consideration, I have decided not to use the functionality option and chose to stick with the hard way. I am moving on to creating GPT-2 from the scratch. I have also decided my site will have to be maintained via git commits.

I am very tired right now since I'm running on only 2.5 hours of sleep, but at the same time I have this excitement about finishing this website. I plan on finishing it before the end of today. For the past few weeks I have been feeling very drawn to those great people from the past. I keep finding myself comparing my own life to theirs, only to realize that I am not even worth a dust particle on their toes. This realization on a daily basis keeps pushing me.